Opps i did it again!!

Haiz... why am i such a stubborn cow!!
I send an email to miss k telling her things like "ok thanks for blocking me on msn, and not replying my sms!" and things like "i guess the next time we meet might be in heaven!, Goodbye! i'll try to dissapear from you life!!"

haiz i sort of regret it now!! but what to do it's a sent mail, i can't take it back!! Well, i dunno every now and then when i'm alone i will think why in the world i sent that mail!! it looks like i just racked the friendship and not i had made it that clear that we can't even be friends anymore!

God can you just let this event get done and over with??
What is it that you want to squeeze me out in this ordeal!!
Exams are just ard the corner!! i need to conc on revision, but yet i'm so SO SO affected by this. Am i suppose to get more C and D in my grade and not able to get that "blessings" that you want to grant me??

What in the world am i here for??
Why no one seems to like me??
How come i always feel like i'm a burden to others!!
Why am i always the person to cause hurt to other!
When will all these end?
God.... DO I SOUND LIKE I'M COMPLAINING TO YOU???
but i just need the JOY, the BLESSINGS and that ABUNDANT life that you PROMISED to give me!!

i can't feel it now, i just feel sucky, feel lonely, feel like crap!!
I'm tired and really at wit's end!
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Can it end now?